HOW I WENT FROM BREAKDOWN TO BREAKTHROUGH...
“I’m such a failure”. Those are the exact words I wrote down inside my journal as I reflected on how much my life had so effortlessly fallen apart. I was defeated. Years of suppressed grief, pain and sadness came up all at once.
I never could have imagined that this breakdown would turn into my greatest breakthrough. I realized for the first time that I was so tired of “being strong” and “having it all together.” I was exhausted, and tired of pretending that everything was fine when it wasn’t. I wanted to grow, heal and evolve.
SO WHAT HAPPENED?
I turned my breakdown, into a breakthrough. I realized that I had been focusing so much on helping other people conquer their demons and make peace with their pasts, that I had unconsciously dismissed my own.
It all started when I was quite young. My Birth Mother abandoned me, so I was adopted at a young age. I’ve always hated bullies, and when myself or other’s would be mistreated, I’d always stand up for the victim, unknowing that this would put a target on my head. This caused my parents to switch me schools in Grade 5, due to me being bullied to the point of social isolation. But even after I switched schools, I still found myself as a bit of an outcast again, making a few close friends, but never truly feeling completely connected to anyone.
Fast forward to my teen years, I endured a lot of pain, suffering and loss. A good friend of mine died in a horrific car accident when I was in grade 10, I had an ex-boyfriend that suicided after I had just graduated grade 12, a friend that attempted suicide, and I was sexually assaulted in the freshman year of College.
I felt so much pain from the people around me, and all I wanted was to relieve some of the suffering of other’s.
Naturally, I became a Social Worker, specializing in Mental Health & Mental Illness, and it wasn’t for another 6 years that I began being consciously aware of how much pain and hurt of my OWN that I had suppressed over the years of helping other people.
WHEN COVID HIT, MY MENTAL HEALTH DETERIORATED.
I had went back to school to advance my career in mental health by becoming an RN, but between lockdowns, online school, working in a hospital with constant Covid cases, social isolation, financial insecurity, job insecurity and family conflicts, I was burnt out. Nothing seemed to be going right and I just couldn’t stay above the water. I realized one morning that I couldn’t fight this battle on my own anymore. So I started seeking guidance from therapists, social workers, mindset coaches and my Doctor. I was then diagnosed with Anxiety and Depression… I was shocked! But that’s when I began my journey of healing.
Within months, I reclaimed my life. I realized that I had been living a life that wasn’t aligned with my authentic self, and that’s what had been causing the manifestations of anxiety and depression. For years I was so fearful to be myself that I was constantly putting on a facade, an armour to protect myself from other’s, that was unconsciously blocking me from connecting. I had built up walls around myself to protect me from getting hurt, without realizing that it was the walls in the first place that were actually hurting me the most.I had to learn to break down the walls that I had struggled to keep for so many years. But when I did this, everything changed.
It took time, but I started feeling like I was walking on a lighter frame. It was like I shed these invisible anchors that were holding me down. And I began to heal.Now my life’s mission is dedicated to help other’s transform their lives from the inside out in the same way that I have done with mine. My aim is to be a guide to those seeking direction by pointing them back to the answers that live inside their own hearts and connecting them to their inner compass so that they can awaken the strength within.
KAYLA MCTAGGART Bio
KAYLA MCTAGGART IS A SOCIAL WORKER, PROFESSIONAL MINDSET COACH, PODCASTER, INSPIRATIONAL SPEAKER, AND PUBLISHED WRITER GUIDING PEOPLE TO RECLAIM THEIR LIFE & BECOME THEIR MOST LIMITLESS SELF BY ELIMINATING THEIR STRUGGLES WITH MENTAL HEALTH.
Kayla is a published writer for Thought Catalog and has been featured in media outlets such as Medium and Tiny Buddha. As founder of Audacious Curiosity, Kayla works with ambitious individuals and business owners that are looking to level-up their life and business with transformative mindset coaching through her engaging content, coaching programs and speaking opportunities.
She has 6 years of experience as a Case Worker in In-Patient mental health and has gathered a comprehensive understanding of the complexity of a wide range of Mental Health challenges and Mental Illnesses that include, but are not limited to: Anxiety, Depression, ADHD, Autism, Tourette Syndrome, Personality Disorders, PTSD, FASD, Tourette Syndrome, Substance Addictions and Suicide Prevention and Intervention.
MY WORK COMBINES THE MOST EFFECTIVE MODALITIES AVAILABLE TO CREATE TRANSFORMATIONAL CHANGE FOR MY CLIENTS.
✓ Emotional Intelligence
✓ Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)
✓ Conflict Management
✓ Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing (EMDR)
✓ Exposure Therapy
✓ Masculine / Feminine Energetics
✓ Psychology (Developmental, Positive, Interpersonal, Evolutionary, Cognitive)
✓ Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy (REBT)
✓ Trauma Release Therapy
• SUNSET WALKS
• PUPPY KISSES
• COLLECTING PLANTS
• BON FIRES + DEEP TALKS